ARTIST STATEMENT
At the core of my work is a profound sense of apprehension, one rooted in the formative years of development when I became acutely aware of the emerging complexities of the social environment.
Our experiences of the past are littered with events both large and small, informed by unspoken social concepts and contracts taken as a 'given.' We become unconsciously dependent upon them to guide us in order to find our place, understand and form relationships, and eventually shape who we end being. In the process an array of aspirations and expectations are formed that influence every facet of our lives, often with conflict, prompting us to take actions that then defines who we end up being or who we want to be. For most the trajectory is instinctively clear, even linear, with a cohesiveness that goes without examination because the supporting structure is there to lead and encourage you to this assigned fulfillment.
Instead I found myself naturally inclined towards one of constant deliberation between the given and the imagined possibilities. In this atmosphere, through a complex line of successive questioning, scenarios were construed, thought through and perceived from (various) as many angles as I could conceive in the hopes that the outcomes would provide me a better understanding of not only the larger 'why,' but also of their motives and subtexts. Through scenarios both imagined and real this created a landscape where reasoning became relative, the environment ambiguous and the emotional a reality. Caught up in imaginative impulse i lost security, in questioning the 'given' i lost structure, and without adequate psychic fortitude i lost agency.
The work represents the ongoing dialogue between and within varying streams of persistent thoughts where, by turning inwards, became personified and allowed to assert themselves. Here the 'I' quickly became displaced, obscured, obstructed and sometimes non-existent or angrily nullified - often represented as small simple head-and-body figures - and caught within otherworldly scenes, inhabited by primal creatures and ambiguous entities, set within landscapes that at times tenuously claim place or association, and accompanied by whimsical if not elaborate embellishments. The work brings the viewer directly into contact with the complexities of these interactions and conflicts, revealing how perception became twisted into misunderstanding, distrust and the environment seen as dangerous or threatening, while simultaneously trying to find and develop genuine connections to solidify my own agency into a cohesive sense of self. Through uncompromisingly raw expressions the work reveals a world blunt in its effect, organic in its execution and deliberately free from superficiality as to more honestly capture the unease, discomfort and insecurity within the unfolding dialogue in two main ways:
The drawing style follows in the vein of automatic drawing where the erratic and shakily drawn lines are, in the same motion, repetitively redrawn without pause. Here landscapes and imagery develop side-by-side, the intensity of the motivating thoughts expressed through focused repetition on emerging aspects of the drawing. Here you will find 'primary iconography,' easily familiar representations like mountains, stone structures, houses, water, skeletons, grasses and bridges that provide the viewer a map for entry. Parts of the drawing are elaborated upon through painting and mark-making to help clarify the events and elements within, as well as to call out moments of importance such as antagonists, power dynamics and fantastical creatures.
In similar fashion the collage aspects further build on this and perform a number of functions, the most important of which is the use of found objects to materialize and emphasize the drawn into tactile moments. By utilizing what at first glance are everyday neutral objects used in whimsical ways - soda tabs, pastry strings, can tops, necklace chains - reveals upon closer inspection their threatening silver lining, tempting the viewer to want to make contact and have to confront them in their own personal space. This push-and-pull of playful embellishment with otherwise familiar objects that, upon closer inspection are dangerous to the touch, reflects the fine line i had to walk in my interactions and highlights the disconnect, friction and isolation in the process [which also becomes inherent throughout the work].
This push-and-pull of playful embellishment with otherwise familiar, or seemingly inoffensive materials, alongside the drawn and painted components, moves towards a better understanding of the disconnect, the friction and the isolation inherent throughout the work.
By integrating the drawn and the collage begins to speak to the malleability to remake oneself, the belief that you are many things rather than one and that these competing aspects are intricately entwined.
It is the struggle to find identity.
Process
Many of my pieces incorporate mixed use found objects to heighten the impact of the narrative.